Adoption is a wonderful way to build your family and create a loving home. Parents who adopt do not always stay together, though, and navigating divorce after adoption can be a tricky task. Adoptive children may have a fear of familial instability, so it is important to approach the transition carefully and provide your whole family with as much support and sensitivity as you possibly can.
The following are three tips you may follow as an adoptive parent to make the situation minimally stressful. Even though divorce is difficult, you can emphasize positive outcomes and guide your family into this new phase.
Prioritize child’s well-being
When your marriage is ending, it is only natural to focus on your feelings, obligations and stresses. When you have kids, though, you are not only responsible for yourself. You are also responsible for your children’s well-being and stability. This is particularly important for adoptive kids; you should make it explicitly clear that they are the first priority. This is an important step toward protecting their emotional and physical health.
Make changes predictable
Adoptive children are sometimes vulnerable to changes in their routine and lifestyle. This is understandable, but it can also be difficult to address when you are preparing kids to adapt to the transition of a divorce. One of the best ways to handle it is to simply be as transparent as possible, letting kids know what changes they can expect so that they have time to adjust.
Commit to collaboration
Perhaps the most important aspect of adoptive parenting after a divorce is collaboration. Of course, you and your ex will have to work together in order to co-parent effectively — but collaboration should extend beyond parents to involve children, too. Involve your kids in decisions as much as possible so they can retain a sense of control and stability.